An explanation of life

On the first day God created the dog. God said, "Sit all day by the door of your house and bark at anyone who comes in or walks past. I will give you a life span of twenty years." The dog said, "That's too long to be barking. Give me ten years and I'll

give you back the other ten."

So God agreed.

On the second day God created the monkey. God said, "Entertain people, do monkey tricks and make them laugh. I'll give you a twenty-year life span." The monkey said, "How boring, monkey tricks for twenty years?

I don't think so. Dog gave you back ten, so that's what I'll do too, okay?"

And God agreed.

On the third day God created the cow. God said, "You must go to the field with the farmer all day long and suffer under the sun, have calves and give milk to support the farmer. I will give you a life span of sixty years. "The cow said, "That's kind of a tough life you want me to live for sixty years. Let me have twenty and I'll give back the other forty."

And God agreed again.

On the forth day God created man. God said, "Eat, sleep, play, marry and enjoy your life. I'll give you twenty years. "Man said, "What? Only twenty years! Tell you what, I'll take my twenty, and the forty the cow gave back and the ten the monkey gave back and the ten the dog gave back, that makes eighty, okay?"

"Okay," said God, "You've got a deal."

So that is why the first twenty years we eat, sleep, play, and enjoy ourselves; for the next forty years we slave in the sun to support our family; for the next ten years we do monkey tricks to entertain the grandchildren; and for the last ten years we sit on the front porch and bark at everyone.

Life has now been explained to you.

For all you budding soloists an Advent song:

Christmas Time is Coming Once Again

(sung to “Winter Wonderland”)

Lyrics by Major William Clarke.

Hear the bells now a-ringing,
hear the songs we’re a-singing,

The glad happy sound tells those all around:

Christmas time is coming once again.

There’s the band serenading,
there’s St. Nick out parading,

Each in his own way proclaiming the day,

Christmas time is coming once again.

Listen to the children as they chatter;

Listen to the “Merry Christmas” call;

Listen to the shoppers as they clatter:

They’re buying pretty presents, one and all.

It’s a time filled with gladness,
cast away all your sadness;

Just lift up your voice in song, and rejoice:

Christmas time is coming once again.

Long ago angels told it,
Shepherds came to behold it,

Each year we reveal how happy we feel;

Christmas time is coming once again.

Every year, in December,
we take time to remember

The baby who came, Christ Jesus his name,

Christmas time is coming once again.

He who found his cradle in a manger

One day bore our sins upon the cross;

There to rid our souls from sin and danger,

He died to free our souls from guilt and loss.

Now to all tell the story,
stand and give God the glory!

Rejoice ever more, your Saviour adore:

Christmas time is coming once again.

Genealogy of Genesis 5

Adam                      Man (is)
Seth                       Appointed
Enosh                     Mortal
Kenan                     Sorrow; (but)
Mahalalel                The Blessed God
Jared                      Shall come down
Enoch                     Teaching
Methuselah             His death shall bring
Lamech                   The Despairing
Noah                       Comfort, Rest

From A to Z

ALPHA, the ATONING SACRIFICE of our sins, our ADVOCATE, the AMEN, the ALMIGHTY the AUTHOR and Finisher of our Faith.

BABE OF BETHLEHEM, the BELOVED SON, the BRIDEGROOM, the BLESSED HOPE, the BREAD of Life, the BRIGHT and Morning Star, Jesus is the BALM of Gilead.

CHRIST, the CREATOR, the CORNERSTONE, the COUNSELOR, the COMFORTER, the CHOSEN one, CRUCIFIED One, the CHIEF SHEPHERD of the Sheep.

DOOR, the DAYSTAR, your DELIGHT, your DELIVERER, the DESIRE of All Nations.

EMMANUEL, the EXALTED One; from EVERLASTING to Everlasting He is God.

FAITHFUL and True Witness, the FIRST FRUITS of the Resurrection, the FOUNTAIN of LIFE; the FULLNESS OF THE GODHEAD BODILY, Jesus is the FRIEND OF SINNERS.

GOOD Shepherd, He is GOOD, and He’s our GOVERNOR. Jesus is the GOD the GREAT PHYSICIAN.

HOLY One, our HOPE, our HELPER, our HEALER, , and our HIGH PRIEST.

I AM, our INHERITANCE, THE IMAGE of the INVISIBLE GOD, the INDESCRIBABLE GIFT.

JUDGE, He is JEHOVAH, He’s our JOY, and He’s our JUSTIFIER.

KING, and THE KING OF KINGS, KING OF GLORY.

LORD, He is LIFE, He is LOVE, and He’s the LIBERATOR, the LAWGIVER, the LIGHT OF THE WORLD, the LIVING WATER, the LION of the Tribe of Judah, the LAMB of God who takes away the sin of the world, He is the LORD of lords.

MESSIAH, the MASTER, and the MEDIATOR. Jesus is the MAN OF SORROWS.

NAZARENE, the NEW WINE, the NEW COVENANT, the NAME that is above all other names.

OMEGA, OFFERING for Sin, He’s OMNIPOTENT; Jesus is the ONLY BEGOTTEN of the Father.

PROPHET, the PRIEST, the PASSOVER Lamb, the PROPITIATION for our Sin; He is the PRINCE OF PEACE.

QUICK and the Powerful Word of God. He’s the QUIETER of the storms of Life.

REDEEMER, the REFUGE, REFINER, the ROSE OF SHARON, the RESURRECTION and the Life, Jesus is the ROCK OF AGES cleft for me. He is the RADIANCE of God’s Glory.

SAVIOUR, the SHEPHERD, the SUFFERING SERVANT, SINLESS SUBSTITUTE, He’s the SON OF MAN, He’s the STONE which the builders rejected, Jesus is the SWEETEST NAME I Know.

TRUTH, He’s the TEACHER, the TESTATOR of the will of God, and He’s your TABERNACLE.

UNBLEMISHED Lamb of God, UNDERSTANDING, the UNCHANGING GOD; He is the UNCTION OF THE SPIRIT.

VINE, He’s the VICARIOUS SACRIFICE, He’s the VICTOR OVER DEATH and the grave.

WAY, He’s the WORD MADE FLESH, He’s the WITNESS, the WATER OF LIFE, and His name is WONDERFUL.

'X' EXPECTED MESSIAH of the Old Testament and EXALTED LORD of the New Testament.

YOKE fellow and YESTERDAY, today and forever He’s the same.

ZION’S HOLY KING. Hallelujah what a Saviour!

He’s the A and the Z and everything in between. He is all I need. Because I have Him, I have everything.

Who wants $20?

A well-known speaker started off his seminar by holding up a $20 bill.  In the room of 200, he asked, "Who would like this $20 bill?"  Hands started going up.  He said, "I am going to give this $20 to one of you but first let me do this." He proceeded to crumple the dollar bill up.  He then asked, "Who still wants it?"   Still the hands were up in the air.  "Well," he replied, "What if I do this?"   And he dropped it on the ground and started to grind it into the floor with his shoe.  He picked it up, now all crumpled and dirty.  "Now who still wants it?"   Still the hands went into the air.

"My friends, you have all learned a very valuable lesson.  No matter what I did to the money, you still wanted it because it did not decrease in value.  It was still worth $20.

Many times in our lives, we are dropped, crumpled, and ground into the dirt by the decisions we make and the circumstances that come our way.  We feel as though we are worthless.  But no matter what has happened or what will happen, you will never lose your value.

You are Special - Don't ever forget it.

"Never let yesterday's disappointments overshadow tomorrow's dreams"